Week 3 What do you Want Wednesday

This is our 3rd week, let’s see where this brings us.

Since it is January, I had the idea of a weekly Email, called: What do you Want Wednesday! Just for us insiders.

It’s important to remember, what it is you wanted when you got started with TTU.

It is important to keep in mind always something that has struck a chord, that instigated a plan or a change, because as time goes by we forget and something else creeps in to take its place and so on and so on.

That leaves us never getting anything we want because we don’t stay the course long enough with any one thing to make what we want to happen actually happen.

We get very committed to things we want at the onset because the emotion is strong.

But emotions are funny things, they are usually influenced by outside sources. How do we keep it going when the influence doesn’t exist anymore?

We have to create a trigger to help us remember on purpose to keep those emotions alive!

We need to keep that feeling going, or it will just fade, and the desire also will fade along with it.

We will not take any action when we lose desire, and that is why, so often, we don’t get what we want.

So I am going to send that same note that I’ve written above every Wednesday, (here is number 3) to remind you to remember what you want… and add a message from me to help motivate you to keep going.

Be sure to write down what you want, if the emotion has gone, bring it back again.

Today Remember what it is you wanted and why, and write it down again. – Look at it every day.

Comment right here on this blog every Wednesday. This is for you, no need to respond to everyone who wrote. We don’t need this to be work. Read others for inspiration but don’t feel you need to write a comment on everyone’s post.

We will just be letting each other know that we are still on track and we can post what it is every week that we are “Remembering.”

Here is a little addition to last weeks topic.

When we try to make a change the body revolts. “NO! STOP! WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING!?”

It get’s scared, because it doesn’t know how to navigate in those waters and it wants to bring you back to the familiar where it feels safe.

I brought it up last week, and I find myself wanting to continue with it this week.

I look at it this way: We were born needing protection, so God put a protector in place and we got used to hearing that voice because that voice seemed to be the loudest for a long time.

If our parents or caregivers were always loving and kind. If our siblings were always tolerant and supportive. If there wasn’t a pecking order in school. If our teachers were all tolerant and encouraging… Well… our protector self wouldn’t be so practiced. But… it has so much practice protecting us that it thinks it is in charge and things that we don’t actually need to be afraid of, makes us afraid.

Like an unpaid bill. Or the possibility of being fired. Or someone making a comment about the way we look. Or changing jobs, moving, making new friends…

What is there to be afraid of with those things? Are we in danger? Nope. But doing something different can hurt you, so we are protecting ourselves right into never doing what we want.

Today, analyze what it is that is bringing up anxiety or apprehension or any kind of fearful feeling. Ask yourself, “Is this really something to be afraid of? Or is my protector just being over protective?” Then, make a decision to feel differently. Talk to yourself, “I don’t have to feel that way, it’s ok, there is nothing to be afraid of. I am not in danger.”

and fake it till you make it. If the scary feeling is coming up again, do it again, do it again and again and again.

Try and remember to do that all week this week.

Now to tie this in with cleaning… When you are balking at change, when you tell yourself NOT to do your routine, or NOT to get up earlier recognize it as your protector because change is scary. You don’t have to FEEL afraid for your protector to be on the job, as long as she can keep you from change, because change is not familiar and you may get hurt, she’ll do it.

All that matters is keeping you safe, and in the familiar!

This is the perfect time to be your own mommy. See what’s going on and move yourself toward change, when you are at a different place or doing something different long enough you will feel safe there and stay there longer and longer till one day, that will be your new norm 🙂

More next week,


Leave a Reply 4 comments

winbydecision - Reply

I want to know what I want. I don’t want *what I want* to be obscured by a mess in my home and by saying “yes” to everything that comes along rather than having the peace of knowing what I want and going after it, with my tidy, organized house as a backdrop for me life. I want work part time. This may mean some tough decisions coming in the next few weeks. — Marcie

    The Tidy Tutor - Reply

    I love it Marcie and it is absolutely necessary to be clear about what we want or we will get a blurred answer. So is your comment saying that you aren’t sure at the moment, but you know that you want to work part time? And you have the vision of your home being neat and organized as being definitely part of what you want.?

Baheejah - Reply

This is down the line of what I was thinking of. Usually when life throws me a curveball like anew baby I unconsciously am in mostly newbie mom mode and not concerned about other stuff I’ve started. For example, I’ve had times when passing up stuff bothered me but when I had a baby or some other life changing event I would not pay attention to stuff. Now, I’ve been in TTU for a little over a year and insider for a little over six months and it hurts to pass it up not pick it up. I have a new baby and it still hurts to pass stuff up. So I’m constantly mindful of that habit.

Also for years while my husband called me beautiful he also made me feel very self conscious about how I look. Saying that this guy (his friend) who wanted to marry me said I have a big nose, then saying a neighbor compared me to Mr. Magoo and he started describing how my nose looked when I was pregnant, he said we discussed it a thousand times before. So I think he thought of it a thousand times before. We never discussed somebody saying that about me. I didn’t even remember my neighbor saying that. Point is, I’m a little afraid that I won’t find someone one day who doesn’t see me that way. I know it’s silly but I need to get over that fear. Also getting over the fear that there aren’t any monogamous men out there who only truly want one woman, me.

    The Tidy Tutor - Reply

    The fact that you took it out of your head and put it out into the world is huge. When we keep things bottled up the get bigger and bigger and seem more real than ridiculous (which they usually are) You are aware of these things as lies. When we have heard something so often that it has become real to us our brains actually dig up grooves that hold all those things as truth. We need to purposefully ignore those so that they can grow over and dig new ones. That is your job. Loving yourself is crucial.Louise Haye is a powerful place to start 🙂 https://youtu.be/jbdB2ss1YLs

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