Overweight / Sloppy
story. And if you did, it bears repeating.
I was born an OC (organizationally challenged) and as I’ve grown up
I’ve taken some (lots) of ridicule over my messiness.
Not so much from my father because he had his hands full and just
didn’t bother with that. He had to be the first to go by the notion “Don’t
sweat the small stuff!.” (Thank God for me)
I didn’t get ridicule from my mother, it was because of her that my father
had his hands full. Not that she intended to leave him with 8
children under the age of 18, but cancer will do that to a person.
Sometimes you have no choice.
Now, I have to say here, that I DO NOT blame my ‘disorder’ on not having
a mother (she died when I was five and I was the baby).
WE ARE NOT MESSY BECAUSE OF OUR UPBRINGING OR
ANY OTHER REASON. We are messy because we are born that way.
Just as you are born musical or mathematical. It is a gift and a talent.
A reason is just a grand excuse for being in a state you wish you weren’t in.
That is a subject for another Motivation Monday, I must stick to the topic.
One of my dear friends who is OG (Organizationally Gifted) used to come
over my house all the time and just start doing stuff so we could sit down
to a nice cup of tea on a table that we could actually put the cup down on.
I would always ask her, “How do you do it!” She always seemed to know just
what to do.
Before I knew it there was a nice hot sudsy sink full of dishes soaking,
the counter was cleaned off with a few neat piles in the corners, the table
was cleaned off, the floor was swept and we were enjoying tea in a
comfortable and tidy (at least on the outside) kitchen.
She would say “Kathy, Just throw the tea bags away.” I would just look at her like,
“Are you kidding me?! That’s all you got?!”
Well, one day while we were in the midst of our traditional ritual, it dawned
on me. I realized something.
You see, I always was thin, and my dear friend has battled with weight since I’ve
known her. I said, “Darling girl, you tell me to throw the tea bag away right?”
Lovingly she answered, “Yes, exactly, throw the tea bags away.”
I replied, also lovingly, “I say to you, my dear friend, put the potato chips down.”
We looked at each other for a long time before speaking. We both got it.
What is easy for one is not easy for another. Whatever is easy for someone,
that someone assumes it should be easy for all. But that obviously can not
be true.
Being critical of someone because they are not how we want them to be
is never fair. We all have work to do on ourselves. And if you really think
about it, it is probably the most unloving thing we can do to those we love.
Not accepting them just as they are. Now if the person you love is abusive
in any way, loving them does not mean you have to stay with them. Boundaries
are a powerful thing. But that is not what I am talking about here.
i am talking about a ‘normal’ relationship, where we are just being human,
imperfect, but wishing so much to just be happy and love each other.
Whether it is a husband & wife, boyfriend & girlfriend, sister to sister, Mother &
daughter, you name it.
We need to have some compassion where compassion is due, and acceptance
where you would like some. We all need to be able to breath freely, especially
in our own home.
Pointing fingers is a sure way to stop any progress from happening, the very
thing you want to happen, you are causing NOT to happen by your
OPINION and judgmental behavior.
“Live and Let Live” is a powerful statement. We should all try it sometime,
while we love people into being the best they can be, instead of pressuring
them to be our expectation of them.Please share this video and if you haven’t tried the first session of TTU FREE please do it right now, right here 🙂